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nerdofchaos:

recreationalcannibalism:

the-adequate-gatsby:

stultifyandstupefy:

derpes:

And God said unto Abraham, “Abraham.”

And Abraham replied, “What.”

God said to John, “Come forth and receive eternal life.” But John came fifth and won a toaster.

And Judas approached the rabbis and Pharisees saying, “The one whom I kiss is the one you seek.”

To which they responded, “Gay.” 

And thus, god made Eve. And she was bammin’ slammin’ bootylicious.

see you all in hell



Reblog If You Haver Ever Used One of These Or Just Know What It Is

marriedetectives:

carry-on-wayward-fallen-angel:

ashashi-corner:

ginathethundergoddess:

yugichrist:

xeppeli:

leader-of-standing-purgatorians:

reblogthings:

image

It’s scares me that only 16,000 people know what this is

wtf is this some kind of choclat bar

This object has killed over 400,000 people

oh my god. 

Guys.

We’re old.

WE’RE THE OLD ONES NOW

*PANICS*

image

AM I THAT OLD?!


valiantparadox:

bro-boner:

It’s days like this that I like to remember that the Irish government are ever proud of the Spire of Dublin.

image

It’s literally a 400 ft metal spike sticking out of the ground. It was supposed to be done for the new millennium but they didn’t start building it until 2002.

And it’s supposed to be self-cleaning but it doesn’t work and there’s no way to clean it.

Ireland.

not to mention it’s ‘unofficial name’

the erection at the intersection


Go down a waterslide when it isn’t wet and you’ll understand why foreplay is so important.

thepocketvolcano:

tow-tow:

geekscoutcookies:

image

This is the best explanation I’ve ever read.


jaclcfrost:

"do you love the character or the person who plays them?"

yes


favabean05:

staticdiplomat:

pickyourheartupoffthefloor:

the-goddamazon:

lancrebitch:

crunchierkatie:

i love seeing girls close ranks when their fella is cheating, instead of defending him and attacking the other girls. like seriously. it warms my cold, cold heart so much. 

i need the rest of this story, where did you put the body

I’ve always wanted to do this. I hope they all went out for ice cream later too.

i want an update on this

FUCKING AMAZING

FORCED TO FLEE WITH HIS NAN


usb-dongle:

it has been one of my greatest dreams to beat the living shit out of something at least once so god fucking help anybody that ever tries to assault me because i will be brimming with every violent urge that i have ever tucked away in my entire life


girldoesnothing:

tonidorsay:

I travel the world for the perfect tea
Everybody’s looking for Darjeeling

Some of them want to infuse you
Some of them want to be infused by you

girldoesnothing:

tonidorsay:

I travel the world for the perfect tea

Everybody’s looking for Darjeeling

Some of them want to infuse you

Some of them want to be infused by you


icecoldnukacola:

i’m cute as hell, which is incidentally where i came from


let’s talk about the physical affects of chronic anxiety because they’re hardly ever acknowledged

little-smoochie-owl:

baby-snakes:

tombtea:

  • upset stomach and vomiting
  • ulcers
  • muscle aches
  • chronic fatigue
  • hormonal problems
  • irregular menstrual cycles
  • insomnia
  • infections
  • lowered immune system
  • migraines
  • shortness of breath
  • dizziness
  • heart palpitations
  • teeth-grinding
  • rashes

it is a lot more than just “feeling anxious “

thank you.


lifeisdisney:

we need to talk about shrek more


officialfgt:

come listen to sad songs and talk about the universe with me